Monday, October 11, 2021

A Quick Trip South: Kampot & Kep

What to do with a three day weekend but get out of town, right?! Along with my friend and colleague L, her husband, their nanny and their child, I headed south to Kampot on Saturday. We had decided that above all else, this would be a gastro tour, so Lisa and I made reservations for every lunch and dinner of the trip. Below is a photo tour of the weekend!


Day 1: Kampot

Roadside coconuts!

Kampot: new and old, side by side.

KFC - Cambodian style!

Gastro-tour 1st stop: Twenty-Three Bistro. Beetroot salad, delicious!

Twenty-Three Bistro. Smoked pineapple margherita. 

The famous (?) Durian roundabout in town.

Amusement park, Kampot style!

Food stall, lots of colors.

Old haunts: in 2010, I stayed at this
guesthouse. It looked a lot different then.

Dinner at Tertulia: beetroot carpaccio, divine!

Tertulia: seafood skewer, with delicious squid,
flaky white fish, and shrimp, along with a lovely
dipping sauce of ginger, garlic, and lemongrass. 


Hotel pool area.

Old Cinema Hotel - my room was comfortable, with a
balcony lots of windows. The bed was hard, the AC cold.


Day 2: Kampot & Kep

Nostalgia time

2010

2021




2010
2021


2010
     
2021


2010
2021




Day 2, Continued


Lion guarding a pagoda

Kampot: Lotus Pond park

Salt fields (out of season)

My only picture from lunch at Ciao

Kep hotel: Knai Bang Chatt - the glorious pool

Feet in the Gulf of Thailand

Kep sunset


Day 3: Kep

Gray morning

Lunch at Majorelle

Amuse-bouche at Majorelle

Langost at Majorelle

Traffic as we returned to Phnom Penh included
trucks-full of factory workers going home.

Deep Breath

 After my funk of last weekend, I'm happy to say that my sense of adventure was rekindled. It helped that Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday last week were local holidays and so I had ample opportunity to get out and explore. 

What holiday, you might ask? Pchum Ben, or Ancestor's Day, is a Buddhist holiday wherein Cambodians make offerings to monks and/or directly to their ancestors. My language teacher here had me read an article about the history of Pchum Ben, and it surprised me: it's a story of a famous monk who went to Hell, threw down a flower that turned into a floating conveyance for him that sped so quickly through Hell that the breeze cooled and protected him, and spoke to the suffering denizens of Hell. He asked how he could help them, and they asked that he tell their living families to send food and good wishes to them to alleviate their suffering. 

Tuesday

I slept in, and then made a little wandering plan for myself: looking at Google maps, I decided to explore the green strips of park near my apartment. Turns out these, parks are long wide boulevards of white pavement and strips of grass, very few trees, and some lovely monuments. I must have wandered for about an hour, reading inscriptions and peering at the stores across the street on either side. Finally, when the heat became too much and my clothing damp from sweat, I headed towards a cafe that a friend told me was lovely. It was across a tree lined side street from a temple complex, and boasted air conditioning that made me smile. Backyard Cafe has vegetarian and vegan options, as well as some meat dishes, and plenty of smoothie options. 

I sat for awhile just soaking it in, before a text message alerted me that a neighbor and friend of mine had seen me enter the cafe from his perch on the upstairs balcony. I joined him there and we chatted, watching a brief rain swing through as we sipped our cold drinks and I ate a salad. 

After walking home, I relaxed for the rest of the day: watching tv, reading a book, and napping. For dinner, I joined a few of my single friends for dinner at a steak restaurant called Mara Steak, Wok and Roll. I had beef lok lak, a local dish that includes chunks of beef in a tasty gravy. It was nice to socialize, but boy oh boy was I ready for bed that night!


Wednesday

After a night of sweaty sleep (my ACs stopped working), I rousted myself early to go for a bike ride with friends M&M, who bike a lot and even have those fancy pedal-click shoes. 

We rode to Big Silk Island, where I took in the views of Cambodians dressed in clean, bright clothing and going to the local wat or pagoda with their canisters of rice to make offerings to the monks. It was quite something to see - festive and happy. 

About twenty some-odd miles later, I got home and took a long cold shower and a nap. In the evening, I joined some newly arrived colleagues for dinner at Khmer Surin, where we enjoyed Cambodian food and an open air second floor all to ourselves. 


Thursday

The ACs were working so I had a good night's sleep, thank goodness. I awoke feeling like a nice breakfast out, so off I went to La Croisette, which is located right across the street from the river. There I enjoyed the view from the plant be-decked terrace and a plate of eggs, toast, and prosciutto-topped arugula salad, along with a smoothie. 



Next up was a wander up the riverside, checking out passing boats, a festive atmosphere of Cambodian families out for the last day of Pchum Ben, picnics, and sunshine. I kept walking, stopping to chat with a American jazz musician and, later, a Cambodian woman who wanted to practice her English. I continued north until finally, the heat won and I caught a tuk-tuk home. 


After a few minutes of cooling off, it was time to change into a swimsuit and head over to Plantation, a hotel nearby that has a lovely oasis of trees, cabanas, and a pool. There I spent four glorious hours, swimming, nibbling, reading, watching a rain shower blow through, and chat with some friends that had the same great idea I did. 



All in all, it was an excellent couple of days. I found my sense of adventure and was nice to myself, and feel like I've got my groove back now. Thank goodness!

Saturday, October 2, 2021

That Lost Feeling, Plus the Jerky Gremlin

The work stress of my first few months in Bamako, Mali, masked the culture shock roller coaster. When it was later pointed out to me that part of my stressed out state was due to that 'coaster, it somehow made me feel a tiny bit better. In Paris, it seemed impossible that I could be subject to culture shock, since everything is so pretty, and tasty, and historic, and iconic. But still, it would hit me at times, there in my bougie suburbia apartment: that feeling, part disappointment in myself for not getting out there to discover new places and make new friends, and part just feeling lonely and lost. 

Here at my third post, when that lost feeling hits me from time to time, I try to be extra nice to myself, mindful that's it will pass. It's not easy though, because of that little voice that's always around to make me question myself. It's that little voice in the back of my mind that has lots of judgement to pass:

Why are you so scared to just go out and explore?

Why don't you have any local friends?

You're missing it all in favor of throwing yourself into work - what's the point of even living abroad, then?

Sure you have a great apartment, but you never go out! You're All Alone and that'll never change at this rate.

What a jerk. 

---

I once saw a self-help book at a Barnes & Noble with a title that included gremlins. It encouraged drawing the speaker of that little voice in your head, and showed examples from the author's patients. There were cartoons of beautiful people and evil ones, and of monsters or animals with fangs. I've thought about that book (which I did not read in full) a lot over the years. What would my gremlin look like? For me, it would look exactly like me, except sometimes it would be a fit, beautiful, vibrant version of myself with a snotty, pinched expression; and sometimes it would be a slovenly, clumsy, fat and boring version of me. Either way, my gremlin is a real asshole.

There are times I can shush the gremlin-me and move beyond it, and times I can't. In the latter, I look in the mirror and see every single one of my insecurities, my frizzy hair and chubby cheeks and dull stupid face, my dumpy and ill-fitting clothes, my boring personality and lonely life. It's clearly a terrible lie, but there it is: my evil gremlin, who whispers ugly nothings in my ear. 

Now combine that jerk's mutterings with a downward spiral of culture shock, that feeling that I'll never get out and meet people outside my bubble, or experience authentic local things... and you've got a really grumpy me that refuses to step outside my apartment door. 

It's a rough day when those two things meet and take over. 

It's been that kind of day today. 

So what to do when forces conspire to make me hide? Well, drinking isn't one of the solutions - that makes it worse. Hanging out with other people can help, but just as often exacerbates the feelings of inadequacy as the Jerk makes comparisons or points out foibles or faux pas. Coloring in coloring books while listening to music; a bubble bath; watching silly tv shows; eating a good meal: these activities are calming and potentially restorative. Sleep, too, soothes the ego. 

---

After writing this, it feels like I shouldn't post it; who will it worry, who will pass judgement, will anyone read it at all? But I will post it, because it's true and it's my blog, after all. And life is not at all bad: Cambodia is an interesting place with lovely people. To prove that it's not all doom and gloom with me, here are a few recent pictures:


Views from the Rosewood sky lounge. 

View from the Rosewood sky lounge. 

View from the Rosewood sky lounge. 

View from my apartment rooftop - love that sky!