Connecting with Cambodia

Photos: Cambodia: Battambang

• Thursday, Dec 16: Relaxed and chatted with Aroma boys in the morning; took cooking class at Tigre de Papier and made fish amok and mango salad; spent the rest of the day chatting and hanging out with the Aroma boys; dinner with Sebastian (lok lak again); bought beers for the guys at the guest house; said good-byes.
• Friday, Dec 17: Took morning “bus” (really a small pickup with twenty passengers stuffed into it) to Tonle Sap pier; took slow boat to Battambang, took about eight hours; checked in to Paris Hotel with Gretta; dinner at White Rose; to bed early!
• Saturday, Dec 18: Up for breakfast at 8am; took a tuk-tuk to the bamboo train and discovered the corruption of new tourist attractions; explored Phom Sampeou with a fourteen-year-old as our guide; relaxed back at the room; out for a late lunch/early dinner; massage by Seeing Hands; out for a drink; to bed at midnight.
• Sunday, Dec 19: Up early to catch bus; said good-bye to Gretta; caught minivan to bus station; bus to Poipet; mini-van to border, where we were dropped off in the middle of a roundabout; walked through border control, first Cambodian side and then, longer wait at the Thai side; somewhere inbetween my bus ticket was taken and exchanged for a piece of blue tape; on Thai side, a minivan picked us up and we drove for three hours to Bangkok; dropped off in Khao San area; checked into same guest house as before.

 

The last week and a half has been an amazing run of meeting fascinating people. In Sihanoukeville, a hippy Turkish couple started making me realize that I wasn’t allowing myself to connect with the local people. The care they took in learning about their hosts at the guest house, knowing their names and situations and personalities, was a real wakeup call for me. I like to think of myself as friendly and out-going and open-minded, but as I’ve been traveling I’ve picked up an “us vs them” mentality. That is to say, a “tourist versus local” kind of view. This was really cemented in Vietnam.

Kampot showed me that the Cambodians are kind and caring, when they offered quiet support and care during my sick days, but I still didn’t learn the names of the guys who brought me fruit and asked how I was feeling. In Kep and Rabbit Island, I kept mostly to myself. In Sihanoukeville, I learned about the young girls working at the guest house and it’s restaurant, thanks to the Turkish couple. I learned to relax and joke with the Cambodian employees at the guest house, instead of just viewing them as servers. And when I made it to Siem Reap, I met someone who completed the lesson for me: Vivi from Germany.

When I arrived at the Aroma Daily guest house in Seam Reap, I was tired. It had been a twelve-hour bus day, complete with an army of tuk-tuk drivers clamoring for my attention and business the minute I stepped off the bus. At the time I was frustrated, but my tuk-tuk driver ended up taking me to a guest house that had me hooked from the moment I arrived. Two women about my age, whom I couldn’t see because they were sitting out in the dark courtyard, called out, “Hello!” when we pulled up. I checked in to a room and immediately came downstairs, asking if I could join the girls. They were Vivi from Germany and Gretta from Australia. I didn’t realize at first that there were several Cambodian men sitting with them, and when I did, I felt awkward.

That lasted all of thirty seconds. Vivi introduced me to everyone, and everyone seemed quite glad to meet me and make room for me to sit and join them. The next five days  were such fun! Not only were the temples amazing and breathtaking, but my experiences just sitting and chatting with Trea, Sam, Same, Taom, Sopheak, Srei and Savannah, not to mention Vivi and Gretta, was a real treat. I learned – somewhat - to interpret their humor, to repeat a few words and learn a bit of the language, and to get to know these people. To tell the truth, Vivi’s openness, friendliness and absolute adoration for all things Cambodian – including her boyfriend/fiance – was completely  infectious and made me feel at ease right away. She is one of those characters that make an everlasting impression on you in a multitude of ways.

I was in Siem Reap for six days and after my first day, I most looked forward to meeting and chatting with the Aroma boys. Trea was quiet and barely said anything, but when he laughed, his whole face lit up. Sam was friendly and eager. Same was a wanna-be player/gangster, but in a joking way; he teaches the others Khmer boxing and makes quite a show if he thinks he’s been slighted. Taom seemed younger than the others and was pretty  excitable, but was the first to 

jump up when I came downstairs. Sopheak, brother to the woman who ran the guest house, was serious until I managed to draw him out a bit. He didn’t smoke or drink like the others, so he was a bit apart, but one-on-one he was wonderful to talk to. His English was the best out of everyone. Srei was playful and head over heels in love with  Vivi, who felt the same about him. And Savannah was also a surprise, since I had felt uncomfortable around him at first and later, he would flash a huge grin at me and wave when I went by. Unfortunately, VIvi and Srei left after my second day; they were going to Srei’s parent’s house, to introduce Vivi and announce their plans for marriage. They got back after I had left for Battambang. 

I hope that I’m able to hold onto the lesson I feel like I was learning in Cambodia: to view and treat and talk to all these locals as real people, not just salespeople 

catering to tourists. It will be hard and in some cases impossible – the big cities are toughest – but my six days in Siem Reap really taught me the reality of travel: meeting not just other travelers, but the locals who are proud of their country and want to share everything  with those willing to listen. 

When I answered the Aroma boy’s question of whether I would come back to Cambodia, they frowned. “Don’t say maybe,” they insisted. “That means you don’t care.”

I can say yes with no hesitation. Cambodia is the first place I’ve been where I felt absolutely drawn to return, whether for another visit or to work I’m not sure. It’s such a mix of rough living conditions and devastating poverty that it surprises me that I want to go back. While I was sick I was terrified that I would need, and not have access to, medical help. I don’t think it would be easy to work or volunteer in Cambodia, in terms of living there.

But I can say absolutely: Yes, I will come back to Cambodia.

--Z